AMAZING! AMAZING!
She really is. I singularly adore this woman as an artist! I do! I do! Morley just exudes a spirit of warmth and authenticity and gratitude and integrity that draws me in to her music in a way that feels real and grounded; in a way that just feels right(eous).*
Music is a weird thing for me. I adore it, but I am so jealous of it...people who can sing. I shake my fist at God every other night that I cannot. It's not even that I want to be able to sing so I can be famous or tour or make videos. I am jealous of that connection to a higher power, of the ability to share that talent and influence people, of that capability to bring forth something marvelous from the inside. Grrrr! I want to know what that feels like in the absolute worst way.
Having said that, here comes the inexplicable disconnect: I will be so disappointed in my future possible kids if they wanted to pursue careers as entertainers. No! No! No! Pick something else!! Be doctors or scientists or some other sort of stereotypically concrete change agent/humanitarian. I can't even come up with a rationale for this feeling, beyond being green with supreme envy. I mean, it's clear I am operating from a binary Western way of thinking that privileges the work that doctors and scientists do above everyone else.
Again, music is weird for me (acting I don't really care about so much all the time) because I remain unclear as to how it overall emotionally affects me. You know how people talk about music being their world and such. I listen to music a whole hell of a lot, but I don't know what that feels like either. I love music, but is it my world? I cannot fake it, I do not know how music has influenced and impacted me. I wish someone could explain it for me. See something I cannot see. Force me to acknowledge something I may be selectively burying or willingly ignoring.
Til then there's just a gap in my thinking that I cannot bridge. Did I mention that Morley was the second artist in life to EVER make me tear up in public ("Women of Hope") and I freaking HATE crying. It's weak TO ME (FOR ME) to cry though I inexplicably easily advocate and recommend its utility for others.
But back to Morley...
I stumbled across her music by randomly attending an event, Tros Femmes, at Aaron Davis Hall back in 2002 in NYC. She performed along with the supremely awesome Tamar-kali and the amazing Angela Johnson.
Heh! Heh I do consider myself an aggressive consumer of the arts and I make it a habit to senibly support so-called independent artists and I don't mind taking a chance paying to do so. I hit the jackpot that night though, discovering the music of those 3 women, but especially Tamar-kali and Morley.
From that night on, I was as a "fan." Perhaps almost every show she performed throughout the city, I tried to attend, along with a good friend. Most especially we traveled back and forth between Joe's Pub, Makor or spots in Brooklyn (I miss that a lot). She was always accessible yet we hesitated (though we really really wanted to) to roll up on her to express gratitude for her musical presence. Her mother even noticed and noted our dedication!
No longer living in the city, I went through Morley concert withdrawal, even told her as much in an email I dared myself to write her, finally thanking her for being so awesome. I really miss seeing her live, but there's nothing I can do about that until further notice.
So I listen to her old CDs, check out the rare YouTube clips or whatever else I stumble across. Oh, I did actually just buy her new CD, Seen, which is only on sale right now in France (pourquoi?). Thank you French Amazon! Thank you NH for the suggestion!
Now I believe that I am really good at recommending all kinds of music to all kinds of people, but I remain absolutely ineffectual in explaining why I love the recommended music even when it is someone like Morley. I can only speak in cliched sound bites that throw up statements like, "Her music is warm, earthy, global-jazzy-folk-pop-rock." That's about the only way I can ever describe her. I can edit that down and one-up it at the same time by reiterating my standard one-word description about artists I really dig: amazing.
I know good and well what amazing sounds like to me but it's just an empty adjective to new ears. My faculties, however, prevent me from offering a more in-depth, coherent and exciting pitch. This is in keeping with my long-standing overall inability to sell anything. I'm sure we can all agree that it is tiring work, anyways, trying to hip (read: convince) people to music you love.** Hell, it is equally tiring to be on the receiving end of that as well...
* Unashamedly, I will be naming at least one possible future kid, Morley
**And why is it always a shock or letdown when people don't respond to the music you love with the same verve. It's like you become incredulous and just a little suspicious of that person. Sort of muttering to yourself or in your head in puzzlement, like, "Really? You didn't like it? Wow, okay." Translation: "You didn't like it?!! For real?!! What the hell is wrong with you?"
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